Yummy Omelettes
by Jenni Piech
Summary: I have no idea why i wrote this...but if ya wanna read it : It's about Snape teaching his potions class how to make omelettes, with humourus results !


Yummy Omelettes  
  
Professor Snape is sitting at his desk, waiting for the class to settle down. Slowly, the class grows quiet, and Snape stands up; ready to begin the lesson.  
  
Snape: Good Morning class...  
  
Ron: *mumbles* What's so good about it?  
  
Snape: Today, we will be making.....*looks around at the class and smiles*....Omelettes.  
  
*the class is confused*  
  
Harry: Omelettes??  
  
Snape: Yes.  
  
Hermione: As in...  
  
Ron: Omelettes???  
  
Snape Mmm Hmmm.  
  
Draco: As in, the thing you make out of eggs?  
  
Snape: That is correct.  
  
*confused silence*  
  
Seamus: You mean, Ome...  
  
Snape: Yes! Omelettes! You all have excellent hearing!  
  
Hermione: But, Sir, this is Potions, an Omelette isn't a Potion...  
  
Snape: I can always rely on you, Miss Granger, to state the obvious. Now, as i was saying. We're making omelettes...  
  
Seamus: But why?  
  
Snape: Because...*thinks* Look, i don't need a reason, i'm the teacher, not you ! Now, i'm assuming that we all know how an omelette is made?  
  
Ron: Uh...i don't...  
  
Draco: Neither do i...  
  
Snape: Do your parents teach you nothing!? Well...anyway, it is really rather simple. The main ingredient is eggs....you all know THAT, don't you? And then, you can add anything else that you like...  
  
Ron: Anything?  
  
Snape: Well, yes i suppose, anything that you like.... . So, all of you come up to the front of the class, and get some eggs, you'll have to work in pairs for this...  
  
2 Minutes later.......  
  
Snape: Now, everyone, crack your eggs into your bowls....like this..*cracks three eggs into his bowl, making it look really easy*  
  
Ron smashes his egg down onto the side of the bowl, spilling egg all over the place , Draco taps his egg lightly on the side of his bowl and can't understand why no egg is coming out , Neville drops his eggs on the floor....etc, etc...  
  
Snape: *looks around in disbelief* How stupid ARE you? You can't even crack eggs !!! I'm starting to think this was a bad idea.....  
  
5 minutes later....  
  
Snape: *sighs angrily* Okay, now we've all mastered the cracking eggs bit, we can move on to the whisking. We shall do this with magic...because i dread to think what will happen if we don't.... . Tap your bowl with your wand and say "whiskiarmus!".  
  
The class do so and successfully whisk their eggs.  
  
Snape: Right, that wasn't so bad...Now you can choose what you want in your omelette. If you...  
  
Ron: I want ham and...  
  
Harry: Chicken !  
  
Hermione: Some vegetables would be nice...  
  
Seamus: I want potatoe !  
  
Dean: Tomato !  
  
Goyle: Eggs !.......I mean......erm..  
  
Crabbe: I like carrots ! They help you see in the dark you know!  
  
Draco: Pineapple !  
  
Snape: *gives random people odd looks* Wha....pineapple!? Now just wait a moment... . If you all come up to the front of the class, i have a big tray full of different things you can add....we have no pineapple i'm afraid...  
  
Draco: *pouts*  
  
5 Minutes later.....  
  
Snape: Now we've all got our omelettes ready, we can cook them ! Get your frying pans ready...and pour your omelette into it...  
  
4 Minutes later...  
  
Ron: Opps....burning !  
  
Draco: This is no good without pineapple !  
  
Harry: Ron i said turn the heat OFF, not UP !  
  
Crabbe: Carrots help you see in the...  
  
Goyle: Yes i know !  
  
Snape: Okay, CAREFULLY tip your omelettes onto your plates...and now they're ready to eat...but wait for a minutes because...  
  
Goyle: Ow! It burnt my tongue !  
  
Snape: *sighs*  
  
1 Minute later...  
  
Ron: Is it supposed to have egg shell in it?  
  
Snape: No..  
  
Ron: Oh...  
  
Hermione: Mine's really nice !  
  
Seamus: How i love potatoes !  
  
Snape: Yeah, well...mine is better than all of yours !  
  
An omelette comes flying through the air and lands on Snapes head.  
  
Snape: Ah ! Who did that?  
  
Everyone points at Draco.  
  
Draco: I didn't do it ! I won't listen to these WILD allegations !!  
  
Suddenly (because i can't think of a better ending) a food fight breaks out in the dungeon, everyone gets real messy, Professor Lupin gets involved at some point and announces that he and Snape are planning to be Wed.  
  
*ahem*  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~THE END~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ 


End file.
